Dealing With the Hand Life Gave You


How do you deal with the hand life has given you?

But really, how do you cope?

Some might take the statement “the hand that life gave you” as being the way school is going, or work, or how family life is going. To others, perhaps financial situations, love life, or just life. Then there’s my hand, my family’s hand. His friends’ hands. My 16-year-old son’s hand – death.

Life dealt him anxiety and depression. Life dealt both of my boys depression, but Zane took the brunt of it. His anxiety was so severe it would lock him up in his room and push his friends away. His BEST friends did not even know he was suffering. He secluded himself from the world. Thanks, life. That brought on the depression, along with girl trouble. Zane didn’t cope very well. His solution? Suicide. Taking that hand and dealing with it his way.

I am here to tell you there are other ways to cope. If life is giving you a wrong hand, talk to someone. Don’t have anyone you think would listen? I have a number for you to call at the end of this post. I will also have a number for you to text.

Suicide isn’t the way to cope. As Zane’s mother, I can promise taking that hand will only lead to more heartache. Now I am the one learning to cope with anxiety and depression. Never did I imagine having to be medicated for this. The last 23 months have been a blur, but without friends and family, I’m not sure what state I would be in. I’m slowly de-medicating and trying more family time instead.

We all cope in our own ways for our own situations. Find yours. But in your process, help someone else find their way of coping. You might be making more of a mark on someone’s life than you think, maybe even saving their life.

Text TALK to 741741

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West Texas has always been my home, and Lubbock has been my work-home for 23 years as a hairstylist. My husband Joe and I have 4 children, Daniel (24), Zane (Forever 16), KaiDyn (13) and Riot (11). Daniel is married to Adrianna and together they have our wild and crazy 5 year old grandson Zeagan. KaiDyn and Riot, whom are siblings, are adopted and have been with us since January of 2018! Joe and I are actively involved in a Suicide Prevention and Awareness Program called #flyhighzane. In 2020 Joe left the oilfield to become self-employed owning a handyman business, Everybody Needs a Joe and Sons. I am here as a mom, a grandmother, a friend, and just someone who has been there. I'm here to talk. Favorite Restaurant: Cancun Favorite Lubbock Landmark: Hell's Gate behind Dunbar Lake (this spot was Zane's favorite) Favorite Tradition: Anything at the National Ranching Heritage Center